1 - Most Important Lesson
During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I
was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times.
She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I
handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.
Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count
toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you
will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and
care, even if all you do is smile and say 'hello'."
"I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.
2 - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the Rain
One night, at 11:30 PM, an older African American woman was standing on the
side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rain storm. Her car had
broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxi cab. She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him.
Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached. It read:
"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The
rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came
along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside
just before he passed away. God bless you for helping me and unselfishly
serving others."
Sincerely,
Mrs. Nat King Cole.
3 - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year old boy entered
a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in
front of him.
"How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.
"Fifty cents," replied the waitress.
The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in
it. "Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more
people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied."
The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away.
The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress
came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly
beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies - You see, he couldn't
have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.
4 - Fourth Important Lesson - The Obstacle in Our Path
In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the king for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the king indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway.
The peasant learned what many of us never understand. Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.
5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheeks. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?" Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her. You see, after all, understanding and attitude, are everything. -- Author Unknown
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Friday, February 23, 2007
Did You Know (Part Two)
In a statue of a person on a horse, if the horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th: John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2nd, but the last signature wasn't added until five years later.
"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. [Editor's note: someone pointed out that "I do" is just as short a sentence, but it's also the longest sentence!
The term "the whole 9 yards" came from W.W.II fighter pilots in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got "The whole nine yards."
Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.
The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the "General Purpose" vehicle: G.P.
The cruise liner Queen Elizabeth II moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel fuel that it burns.
The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League Baseball All-Star Game.
The nursery rhyme "Ring Around the Rosey" is a rhyme about the plague. Infected people with the plague would get red circular sores ("Ring around the rosey"). These sores would smell very badly so common folks would put flowers on their bodies somewhere (inconspicuously), so that it would cover the smell of the sores ("a pocket full of posies"). Furthermore, people who died from the plague would be burned so as to reduce the possible spread of the disease ("ashes, to ashes, we all fall down").
Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th: John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2nd, but the last signature wasn't added until five years later.
"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language. [Editor's note: someone pointed out that "I do" is just as short a sentence, but it's also the longest sentence!
The term "the whole 9 yards" came from W.W.II fighter pilots in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got "The whole nine yards."
Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.
The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army for the "General Purpose" vehicle: G.P.
The cruise liner Queen Elizabeth II moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel fuel that it burns.
The only two days of the year in which there are no professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are the day before and the day after the Major League Baseball All-Star Game.
The nursery rhyme "Ring Around the Rosey" is a rhyme about the plague. Infected people with the plague would get red circular sores ("Ring around the rosey"). These sores would smell very badly so common folks would put flowers on their bodies somewhere (inconspicuously), so that it would cover the smell of the sores ("a pocket full of posies"). Furthermore, people who died from the plague would be burned so as to reduce the possible spread of the disease ("ashes, to ashes, we all fall down").
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Did you know...
More collect calls are made on Father's Day than any other day of the year.
If you were to spell out numbers, you would have to count all the way to 1,000 before you found one that contained the letter A.
The most popular name requested for boats is Obsession.
Bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers were all invented by women.
40% of all people at a party will snoop in the host's medicine cabinet.
Honey is the only food that does not spoil [Editor's Note...that's pasteurized honey, the kind you buy in the store, as opposed to honey fresh from the beehive].
Mel Blanc, the voice of Bugs Bunny, was allergic to carrots, ironically.
More people are conceived in December than any other month.
"60 Minutes" is the only show on primetime television without a theme song.
Fred & Wilma Flintstone were the first couple to be shown in bed together on primetime TV.
Coca-Cola was originally green.
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury
Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear & smell better.
Alaska is the state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work.
The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%.
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%.
The cost of raising a medium-sized dog to the age of eleven: $6,400.
The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000.
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments in the US.
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: King David (spades), Alexander the Great (clubs), Charlemagne (hearts), Julius Caesar (diamonds).
If you were to spell out numbers, you would have to count all the way to 1,000 before you found one that contained the letter A.
The most popular name requested for boats is Obsession.
Bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers were all invented by women.
40% of all people at a party will snoop in the host's medicine cabinet.
Honey is the only food that does not spoil [Editor's Note...that's pasteurized honey, the kind you buy in the store, as opposed to honey fresh from the beehive].
Mel Blanc, the voice of Bugs Bunny, was allergic to carrots, ironically.
More people are conceived in December than any other month.
"60 Minutes" is the only show on primetime television without a theme song.
Fred & Wilma Flintstone were the first couple to be shown in bed together on primetime TV.
Coca-Cola was originally green.
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury
Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear & smell better.
Alaska is the state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work.
The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%.
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%.
The cost of raising a medium-sized dog to the age of eleven: $6,400.
The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000.
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments in the US.
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: King David (spades), Alexander the Great (clubs), Charlemagne (hearts), Julius Caesar (diamonds).
Monday, February 19, 2007
Wisdom from Will Rogers
Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935, was probably the greatest political sage this country has ever known. Enjoy the following:
ABOUT GROWING OLDER...
- Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
- Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
- There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.
- Never miss a good chance to shut up.
- Always drink upstream from the herd.
- If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.
- The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
- There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.
- Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
- If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
- Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
- After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral:When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
ABOUT GROWING OLDER...
- Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
- The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
- Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
- When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
- You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
- I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
- One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.
- One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
- Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
- Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf
- If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Children's Science Exam Answers
These are real answers given by children.
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead
sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the
moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where
the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids ?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen).
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the
abdominalcavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead
sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the
moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where
the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids ?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen).
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity.
The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the
abdominalcavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
What 30 Years Can Do
1976: Long hair
2006: Longing for hair
1976: KEG
2006: EKG
1976: Acid rock
2006: Acid reflux
1976: Moving to California because it's cool
2006: Moving to California because it's warm
1976: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2006: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1976: Seeds and stems
2006: Roughage
1976: Hoping for a BMW
2006: Hoping for a BM
1976: Going to a new, hip joint
2006: Receiving a new hip joint
1976: Rolling Stones
2006: Kidney Stones
1976: Being called into the principal's office
2006: Calling the principal's office
1976: Screw the system
2006: Upgrade the system
1976: Disco
2006: Costco
1976: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2006: Children begging you to get their heads shaved
1976: Passing the drivers' test
2006: Passing the vision test
1976: Whatever
2006: Depends
2006: Longing for hair
1976: KEG
2006: EKG
1976: Acid rock
2006: Acid reflux
1976: Moving to California because it's cool
2006: Moving to California because it's warm
1976: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2006: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1976: Seeds and stems
2006: Roughage
1976: Hoping for a BMW
2006: Hoping for a BM
1976: Going to a new, hip joint
2006: Receiving a new hip joint
1976: Rolling Stones
2006: Kidney Stones
1976: Being called into the principal's office
2006: Calling the principal's office
1976: Screw the system
2006: Upgrade the system
1976: Disco
2006: Costco
1976: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2006: Children begging you to get their heads shaved
1976: Passing the drivers' test
2006: Passing the vision test
1976: Whatever
2006: Depends
Friday, February 02, 2007
The Ant and the Grasshopper
CLASSIC VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.
MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Bill and Hillary Clinton make a special guest appearance on the CBS Evening News to tell a concerned Dan Rather that they will do everything they can for the grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those who benefited unfairly during the Reagan summers, or as Bill refers to it as "Temperatures of the 80's".
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients who can only hear cases on Thursday's between 1:30 and 3:00 PM when there are no talk shows scheduled.' The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him since he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. And on the TV, which the grasshopper bought by selling most of the ant's food, they are showing Bill Clinton standing before a wildly applauding group of Democrats announcing that a new era of "fairness" has dawned in America.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood
MODERN VERSION: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving. CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Bill and Hillary Clinton make a special guest appearance on the CBS Evening News to tell a concerned Dan Rather that they will do everything they can for the grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those who benefited unfairly during the Reagan summers, or as Bill refers to it as "Temperatures of the 80's".
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients who can only hear cases on Thursday's between 1:30 and 3:00 PM when there are no talk shows scheduled.' The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him since he doesn't maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. And on the TV, which the grasshopper bought by selling most of the ant's food, they are showing Bill Clinton standing before a wildly applauding group of Democrats announcing that a new era of "fairness" has dawned in America.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Dear Pastor: Letters From Children
Dear Pastor, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister.
Dear Pastor, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson.
Dear Pastor, My father should be a minister. Every day he gives us a sermon about something.
Dear Pastor, I'm sorry I can't leave more money in the plate, but my father didn't give me a
raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermon about a raise in my allowance?
Dear Pastor, My mother is very religious. She goes to play bingo at church every week even if she has a cold.
Dear Pastor, I would like to go to heaven someday because I know my brother won't be there.
Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland.
Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon where you said that good health is more important than money but I still want a raise in my allowance.
Dear Pastor, Please pray for all the airline pilots. I am flying to California tomorrow.
Dear Pastor, I hope to go to heaven some day but later than sooner.
Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God's help or a new pitcher. Thank you.
Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the Ten Commandments. But I don't think I want to because we have enough rules already in my house.
Dear Pastor, Who does God pray to? Is there a God for God?
Dear Pastor, Are there any devils on earth? I think there may be one in my class.
Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished.
Dear Pastor, How does God know the good people from the bad people? Do you tell Him or does He read about it in the newspapers?
Dear Pastor, Please say in your sermon that Peter Peterson has been a good boy all week. I am Peter Peterson.
Dear Pastor, My father should be a minister. Every day he gives us a sermon about something.
Dear Pastor, I'm sorry I can't leave more money in the plate, but my father didn't give me a
raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermon about a raise in my allowance?
Dear Pastor, My mother is very religious. She goes to play bingo at church every week even if she has a cold.
Dear Pastor, I would like to go to heaven someday because I know my brother won't be there.
Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland.
Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon where you said that good health is more important than money but I still want a raise in my allowance.
Dear Pastor, Please pray for all the airline pilots. I am flying to California tomorrow.
Dear Pastor, I hope to go to heaven some day but later than sooner.
Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God's help or a new pitcher. Thank you.
Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the Ten Commandments. But I don't think I want to because we have enough rules already in my house.
Dear Pastor, Who does God pray to? Is there a God for God?
Dear Pastor, Are there any devils on earth? I think there may be one in my class.
Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished.
Dear Pastor, How does God know the good people from the bad people? Do you tell Him or does He read about it in the newspapers?
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Bathroom Conversation
Leaving Atlanta, I decided to stop at one of those rest areas on the side of the road. I go into the washroom.
The first stall is taken, so I go into the second stall. I had just sat down when I hear a voice from the other stall............
Hi there, how is it going?
Okay, I am not the type to strike up conversations with strangers in washrooms on the side of the road. I didn't know what to say, so finally I say: -Not bad............
Then the voice says: So, what are you doing?
I am starting to find this a bit weird, but I say: - Well, I'm going back west...............
Then I hear the person, all flustered, say:
Look, I'll call you back--every time I ask you a question this idiot in the next stall keeps answering me!!!
The first stall is taken, so I go into the second stall. I had just sat down when I hear a voice from the other stall............
Hi there, how is it going?
Okay, I am not the type to strike up conversations with strangers in washrooms on the side of the road. I didn't know what to say, so finally I say: -Not bad............
Then the voice says: So, what are you doing?
I am starting to find this a bit weird, but I say: - Well, I'm going back west...............
Then I hear the person, all flustered, say:
Look, I'll call you back--every time I ask you a question this idiot in the next stall keeps answering me!!!
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Be Careful and Watch
Watch your thoughts;
they become words.
Watch your words;
they become actions.
Watch your actions;
they become habits.
Watch your habits;
they become character.
Watch your character;
it becomes your destiny.
-Author Unknown-
they become words.
Watch your words;
they become actions.
Watch your actions;
they become habits.
Watch your habits;
they become character.
Watch your character;
it becomes your destiny.
-Author Unknown-
Thursday, January 18, 2007
A Story Of Four Wives
Once upon a time...there was a rich King who had four wives. He loved the fourth wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to the finest of delicacies. He gave her nothing but the best.
He also loved the third wife very much, and he was always showing her off to neighboring kingdoms. However, he feared that one day she would leave him for another.
He also loved his second wife. She was his confidante and was always kind, considerate, and patient with him. Whenever the King faced a problem, he could confide in her to help him get through the difficult times.
The King's first wife was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.
One day, the King fell ill, and he knew his time was short. He thought of his luxurious life and pondered, "I now have four wives with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.
Thus, he asked the fourth wife, "I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing, and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "Absolutely not!" replied the fourth wife, and she walked away without another word. Her answer cut like a sharp knife right into his heart.
The sad King then asked the third wife, "I have loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No," replied the third wife. "Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to remarry!" His heart sank and turned cold.
He then asked the second wife, "I have always turned to you for help, and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time," replied the second wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave."
Her answer came like a bolt of thunder, and the King was devastated.
Then a voice called out. "I'll leave with you and follow you no matter where you go." The King looked up, and there was his first wife. She was so sad and thin, she looked half-starved. Greatly grieved, the King said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"
In truth, we all have four wives in our lives: Our fourth wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.
Our third wife is our possessions, status, and wealth. When we die, it will all go to others.
Our second wife is our family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for us, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
And our first wife is our soul, often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power, and pleasures of the ego. However, our soul is the only thing that will follow us wherever we go. So cultivate, strengthen, and cherish it now! It IS your greatest gift to offer the world.
He also loved the third wife very much, and he was always showing her off to neighboring kingdoms. However, he feared that one day she would leave him for another.
He also loved his second wife. She was his confidante and was always kind, considerate, and patient with him. Whenever the King faced a problem, he could confide in her to help him get through the difficult times.
The King's first wife was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and kingdom. However, he did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.
One day, the King fell ill, and he knew his time was short. He thought of his luxurious life and pondered, "I now have four wives with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.
Thus, he asked the fourth wife, "I have loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing, and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "Absolutely not!" replied the fourth wife, and she walked away without another word. Her answer cut like a sharp knife right into his heart.
The sad King then asked the third wife, "I have loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No," replied the third wife. "Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to remarry!" His heart sank and turned cold.
He then asked the second wife, "I have always turned to you for help, and you've always been there for me. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time," replied the second wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave."
Her answer came like a bolt of thunder, and the King was devastated.
Then a voice called out. "I'll leave with you and follow you no matter where you go." The King looked up, and there was his first wife. She was so sad and thin, she looked half-starved. Greatly grieved, the King said, "I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!"
In truth, we all have four wives in our lives: Our fourth wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.
Our third wife is our possessions, status, and wealth. When we die, it will all go to others.
Our second wife is our family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for us, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.
And our first wife is our soul, often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power, and pleasures of the ego. However, our soul is the only thing that will follow us wherever we go. So cultivate, strengthen, and cherish it now! It IS your greatest gift to offer the world.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
Encouraging Words
A group of frogs was traveling through the woods, and two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit. When they saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead. The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all of their might.
The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.
The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.
This story teaches two lessons:
1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day.
2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to kill them. Be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path.
The power of words: it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way.
Anyone can speak words that tend to rob another of the spirit to continue in difficult times. Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.
Be Special to others.
The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead. Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.
The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out. When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.
This story teaches two lessons:
1. There is power of life and death in the tongue. An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day.
2. A destructive word to someone who is down can be what it takes to kill them. Be careful of what you say. Speak life to those who cross your path.
The power of words: it is sometimes hard to understand that an encouraging word can go such a long way.
Anyone can speak words that tend to rob another of the spirit to continue in difficult times. Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.
Be Special to others.
Friday, January 12, 2007
Enlightened Perspective - Part Two
Here's a few more. If you will take the time to read these. I promise you'll come away with an enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all on a daily basis! They're written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. Enjoy.......
I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.
I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.
I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
I've learned.... That there's nothing sweeter than sleeping with your babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.
I've learned.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
I've learned.... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.
I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Dad that I love him one more time before he passed away.
I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
I've learned.... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.
I've learned.... That I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.
I've learned.... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.
I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.
I've learned ... That it is best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it is requested and when it is a life threatening situation.
I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.
I've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.
I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.
I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.
I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.
I've learned.... That there's nothing sweeter than sleeping with your babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.
I've learned.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.
I've learned.... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.
I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.
I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.
I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Dad that I love him one more time before he passed away.
I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.
I've learned.... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.
I've learned.... That I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.
I've learned.... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.
I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.
I've learned ... That it is best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it is requested and when it is a life threatening situation.
I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Enlightened Perspective - Part One
If you will take the time to read these. I promise you'll come away with an enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all on a daily basis! They're written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. Enjoy.......
I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows.
I've learned.... That just one person saying to me "You've made my day" makes my day.
I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.
I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.
I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him
in some other way.
I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
I've learned.... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I
was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.
I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
I've learned... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
I've learned.... That the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?
I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.
I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows.
I've learned.... That just one person saying to me "You've made my day" makes my day.
I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.
I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.
I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.
I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him
in some other way.
I've learned.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.
I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.
I've learned.... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I
was a child did wonders for me as an adult.
I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.
I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.
I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.
I've learned... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.
I've learned.... That the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?
Sunday, January 07, 2007
Angel in the Classroom
A pastor read a letter in church from an elementary school teacher who attends East Hill Church. The gist of the letter was as follows:
Last school year, her classroom was made up of little third graders, every one of which came from either a single parent family, or a dysfunctional family, was undernourished and/or uncared for, lived in an abusive home and was either beaten, bruised, or raped by other family members; one little girl's dad died of aids, and the list goes on. Her heart bled for these kids.
Before the '99-2000 school year started, she and her husband went to her classroom and prayed over each desk in the room. They prayed that God would place an angel behind each and every child throughout the coming year to watch over them and protect them. A month or so after the year had started, she gave the kids an assignment to write about what they would like to be when they grew up. Everybody was busy with his or her assignment, when "Andrew" raised his hand. When she asked him what he needed, he asked how to spell mighty." After telling him how to spell mighty, she asked him why he needed to know. Andrew said it was because when he grew up he wanted to be a "mighty man of God." When he said this, little "Mark" sitting next to him asked, "So, what's a mighty man of God?" The teacher, swallowing back her tears, and knowing she could not say anything in the classroom, told Andrew to go ahead and tell Mark what it was. So Andrew says, "It's a man who puts on the armor of God and is a soldier for God." After observing some conversation between Andrew and Mark, the teacher, with a lump in her throat, started to walk away when Andrew motioned with his little forefinger for her to come closer. He whispered to her, asking if she believed in angels. She told him yes, she did. Then he asked her if she thought people could see angels, and she said she thought some people probably could. Andrew said that he did, and he could see an angel standing behind each kid in the room . . . . . .
I don't think there was a dry eye in the church that night! We need to remember to pray for all of the teachers, that although there is no prayer in school, that they are dedicated enough to pray for the protection of God's angels over the lives of their students. Maybe it wouldn't hurt, even at work.
-- Author Unknown
Last school year, her classroom was made up of little third graders, every one of which came from either a single parent family, or a dysfunctional family, was undernourished and/or uncared for, lived in an abusive home and was either beaten, bruised, or raped by other family members; one little girl's dad died of aids, and the list goes on. Her heart bled for these kids.
Before the '99-2000 school year started, she and her husband went to her classroom and prayed over each desk in the room. They prayed that God would place an angel behind each and every child throughout the coming year to watch over them and protect them. A month or so after the year had started, she gave the kids an assignment to write about what they would like to be when they grew up. Everybody was busy with his or her assignment, when "Andrew" raised his hand. When she asked him what he needed, he asked how to spell mighty." After telling him how to spell mighty, she asked him why he needed to know. Andrew said it was because when he grew up he wanted to be a "mighty man of God." When he said this, little "Mark" sitting next to him asked, "So, what's a mighty man of God?" The teacher, swallowing back her tears, and knowing she could not say anything in the classroom, told Andrew to go ahead and tell Mark what it was. So Andrew says, "It's a man who puts on the armor of God and is a soldier for God." After observing some conversation between Andrew and Mark, the teacher, with a lump in her throat, started to walk away when Andrew motioned with his little forefinger for her to come closer. He whispered to her, asking if she believed in angels. She told him yes, she did. Then he asked her if she thought people could see angels, and she said she thought some people probably could. Andrew said that he did, and he could see an angel standing behind each kid in the room . . . . . .
I don't think there was a dry eye in the church that night! We need to remember to pray for all of the teachers, that although there is no prayer in school, that they are dedicated enough to pray for the protection of God's angels over the lives of their students. Maybe it wouldn't hurt, even at work.
-- Author Unknown
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Dad's Empty Chair
A man's daughter had asked the local minister to come and pray with her father. When the minister arrived, he found the man lying in bed with his head propped up on two pillows. An empty chair sat beside his bed.
The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. "I guess you were expecting me," he said. "No, who are you?" said the father.
The minister told him his name and then remarked, "I saw the empty chair and I figured you knew I was going to show up." "Oh yeah, the chair," said the bedridden man. "Would you mind closing the door?"
Puzzled, the minister shut the door. "I have never told anyone this, not even my daughter," said the man. "But all of my life I have never known how to pray. At church I used to hear the pastor talk about prayer, but it went right over my head." I abandoned any attempt at prayer," the old man continued, "until one day four years ago my best friend said to me, "Johnny, prayer is just a simple matter of having a conversation with Jesus. Here is what I suggest."
"Sit down in a chair; place an empty chair in front of you, and in faith see Jesus on the chair. It's not spooky because he promised, 'I will be with you always'. "Then just speak to him in the same way you're doing with me right now."
"So, I tried it and I've liked it so much that I do it a couple of hours every day. I'm careful though. If my daughter saw me talking to an empty chair, she'd either have a nervous breakdown or send me off to the funny farm."
The minister was deeply moved by the story and encouraged the old man to continue on the journey. Then he prayed with him, anointed him with oil, and returned to the church.
Two nights later the daughter called to tell the minister that her daddy had died that afternoon.
"Did he die in peace?" he asked.
"Yes, when I left the house about two o'clock, he called me over to his bedside, told me he loved me and kissed me on the cheek. When I got back from the store an hour later, I found him dead. But there was something strange about his death. Apparently, just before Daddy died, he leaned over and rested his head on the chair beside the bed. What do you make of that?"
The minister wiped a tear from his eye and said, "I wish we could all go like that."
The minister assumed that the old fellow had been informed of his visit. "I guess you were expecting me," he said. "No, who are you?" said the father.
The minister told him his name and then remarked, "I saw the empty chair and I figured you knew I was going to show up." "Oh yeah, the chair," said the bedridden man. "Would you mind closing the door?"
Puzzled, the minister shut the door. "I have never told anyone this, not even my daughter," said the man. "But all of my life I have never known how to pray. At church I used to hear the pastor talk about prayer, but it went right over my head." I abandoned any attempt at prayer," the old man continued, "until one day four years ago my best friend said to me, "Johnny, prayer is just a simple matter of having a conversation with Jesus. Here is what I suggest."
"Sit down in a chair; place an empty chair in front of you, and in faith see Jesus on the chair. It's not spooky because he promised, 'I will be with you always'. "Then just speak to him in the same way you're doing with me right now."
"So, I tried it and I've liked it so much that I do it a couple of hours every day. I'm careful though. If my daughter saw me talking to an empty chair, she'd either have a nervous breakdown or send me off to the funny farm."
The minister was deeply moved by the story and encouraged the old man to continue on the journey. Then he prayed with him, anointed him with oil, and returned to the church.
Two nights later the daughter called to tell the minister that her daddy had died that afternoon.
"Did he die in peace?" he asked.
"Yes, when I left the house about two o'clock, he called me over to his bedside, told me he loved me and kissed me on the cheek. When I got back from the store an hour later, I found him dead. But there was something strange about his death. Apparently, just before Daddy died, he leaned over and rested his head on the chair beside the bed. What do you make of that?"
The minister wiped a tear from his eye and said, "I wish we could all go like that."
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Car Thief and Answer to Prayer
A woman received a phone call that her daughter was very sick with a fever. She left work and stopped by the pharmacy for some medication for her daughter. When returning to her car to find she had locked her keys inside. She had get home to her sick daughter, and didn't know what to do.
She called her home to the baby sitter, and was told her daughter was getting worse. She said, "You might find a coat hanger and use that to open the door." The woman found an old rusty coat hanger on the ground, as if someone else had locked their keys in their car. Then she looked at the hanger and said, "I don't know how to use this." She bowed her head and asked God for help.
An old rusty car pulled up, driven by a dirty, greasy, bearded man with a biker skull rag on his head. The woman thought, "Great God. This is what you sent to help me????" But she was desperate, and thankful. The man got out of his car and asked if he could help. She said "Yes, my daughter is very sick. I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car." He said, "SURE."
He walked over to the car and in seconds the car was opened. She hugged the man and through her tears she said, "THANK YOU SO MUCH..... You are a very nice man." The man replied, "Lady, I ain't a nice man. I just got out of prison for car theft." The woman hugged the man again and cried out loud.....
THANK YOU GOD FOR SENDING ME A PROFESSIONAL!"
She called her home to the baby sitter, and was told her daughter was getting worse. She said, "You might find a coat hanger and use that to open the door." The woman found an old rusty coat hanger on the ground, as if someone else had locked their keys in their car. Then she looked at the hanger and said, "I don't know how to use this." She bowed her head and asked God for help.
An old rusty car pulled up, driven by a dirty, greasy, bearded man with a biker skull rag on his head. The woman thought, "Great God. This is what you sent to help me????" But she was desperate, and thankful. The man got out of his car and asked if he could help. She said "Yes, my daughter is very sick. I must get home to her. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car." He said, "SURE."
He walked over to the car and in seconds the car was opened. She hugged the man and through her tears she said, "THANK YOU SO MUCH..... You are a very nice man." The man replied, "Lady, I ain't a nice man. I just got out of prison for car theft." The woman hugged the man again and cried out loud.....
THANK YOU GOD FOR SENDING ME A PROFESSIONAL!"
Friday, December 22, 2006
The Tablecloth
The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited about their opportunities. When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work. They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve.
They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc. and on Dec 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished. On Dec 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days.
On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high. The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, headed home. On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity so he stopped in.
One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross-embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later.
She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area.
Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria.
The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten the Tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria. When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. She was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.
The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home. That was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return. One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood, continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving. The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike?
He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety, and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years in between.
The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier. He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
True Story - submitted by Pastor Rob Reid
They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc. and on Dec 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished. On Dec 19 a terrible tempest - a driving rainstorm hit the area and lasted for two days.
On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church. His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high. The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, headed home. On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity so he stopped in.
One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross-embroidered right in the center. It was just the right size to cover up the hole in the front wall. He bought it and headed back to the church.
By this time it had started to snow. An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus. She missed it. The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later.
She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc., to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry. The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area.
Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet. "Pastor," she asked, "where did you get that tablecloth?" The pastor explained. The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there. They were. These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria.
The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten the Tablecloth. The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria. When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave. Her husband was going to follow her the next week. She was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.
The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church. The pastor insisted on driving her home. That was the least he could do. She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job.
What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve. The church was almost full. The music and the spirit were great. At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return. One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood, continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn't leaving. The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike?
He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety, and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison. He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years in between.
The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride. They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier. He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman's apartment, knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.
True Story - submitted by Pastor Rob Reid
Monday, December 18, 2006
But Why?
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt."
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
What do you call male ballerinas?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
Friday, December 15, 2006
Be Careful and Watch
Watch your thoughts;
they become words.
Watch your words;
they become actions.
Watch your actions;
they become habits.
Watch your habits;
they become character.
Watch your character;
it becomes your destiny.
-Author Unknown-
they become words.
Watch your words;
they become actions.
Watch your actions;
they become habits.
Watch your habits;
they become character.
Watch your character;
it becomes your destiny.
-Author Unknown-
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